Follow up on “Chinese Moms”

I just noticed these Wall Street Journal follow ups on the “Chinese mothers” article to which I referred yesterday.  One is a review of Ms. Chua’s book Battle Hymn of the Tiger Mother.  The other is a counter point from someone raised with a more laid back approach: “In Defense of Laissez Faire Parenting.”

I thought that those who read yesterday’s post might be interested in these.

4 thoughts on “Follow up on “Chinese Moms”

  1. Yep, sure am interested, Mr. Smith. Thank God I had the freedom to be myself when I was growing up, aside from people (including my family) encouraging my theoretical and musical sides too much and my imaginative and emotional sides not nearly enough.

  2. There are many ways to raise kids these days – something I’m just discovering, but there are many wrong ways to do, unfortunately there’s no rule book, the only guidelines we have is the law and that [arguably] is not very objective.
    As a mother myself, the most important thing to me is my child’s well being in the present and future, and my decisions in terms of discipline are based around that and my faith.
    Mrs Chua seems to take a lead from her culture on how to raise her children and it appears she finds comfort in the fact that she’s getting results from her child. Personally I’d be miserable if I had to adopt her parenting style as home would seem more like a warzone.

  3. Given what I’m studying these days, I’m thinking: if only people had tried to figure out what mental processes lay behind the lessons of the Beatitudes all along, we would have a complete and useful model of how humans are supposed to behave and how to raise them as individuals within a collective society. As it is, people in the secular world have had to stumble across those same underlying principles empirically and without God’s guidance they still don’t quite agree with each other as to how they’re to be understood and applied in practice.

    There’s a rule book on child rearing all right, it’s biblically based and it goes well beyond the practical maxims of Proverbs. And I’m beginning to find out that people (those who were wise, anyway) were intuitively more aware of that fact in antiquity than they are today – much more so, probably. Satan has got us so turned around that most of us don’t even understand who we are, let alone who God is.

  4. Steve

    Well, I think both MsLuffa and Rakkav have a good point. Assuming that I understand them correctly.

    To some extent, raising kids is something you learn in the doing of it. You can’t explain that to someone who doesn’t have kids. The actual experience is different from what you anticipate. I think that’s what MsLuffa was getting at.

    The Bible does indeed offer a number of child rearing principles to go by; quite a number in fact. You just have to stitch them together through study. I think that’s what John was getting at.

    My experience? The main principle is love. Sounds corny, but it’s true. Remember that little baby boy pinching your forearm hairs? How the toddler would copy everything you did? How you would explain something to him, then see the light bulb go off in his head? How his mother would cuddle him, and hum songs to him?

    How can that not get to your heart?

    It’s all about love. You don’t want to see your kid get in trouble when he grows up, so you discipline him. You want him to get a good job some day, so you train how to study and get good grades. And so on.

    And love makes you want to see him flower in his own right. Give him new things and new experiences to discover his own natural talents and abilities. Then help him develop that potential, whatever that might be.

    Someday the young eagle will leave the nest. He will fly above the clouds, and fill the sky with the cry of his heartsong. As parents, you can call back to him, with respect and joy. That’s how I view parenting.

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