ketchup /kech’ • up/ n. A lubricant applied to undesirable food for the purpose of more easily sliding the food down the throats of children.
This definition came to me last night at dinner (a fantastic grilled salmon dinner made by my wife, I might add) while trying to encourage my children to eat more of what lay before them. Giving them the chance to put some ketchup on some of the items worked (as it usually does), but I fear being arrested by the culinary police if I ever step foot in France.
(And “undesirable” here is a matter of youthful opinion. As I said, the dinner was fantastic, and when their tastes mature they will learn what they were missing (happened to me!). Until then, apply ketchup as needed.)