My new American Express card, that is. Actually, it’s not a new account, just a replacement card I received in the mail today for my poor, old, weathered AmEx which is ready for the great shredder that lies beyond the veil. (Actually, I believe that credit cards, like human beings, do not have an “eternal soul.” In the case of human beings, I base my belief on the Bible. In the case of credit cards, I base my believe that only soulless denizens of some shadowy, mythical nether realm could wreak such havoc in peoples’ lives without shedding at least one tear. And while they have no eternal souls, their interest payments do live forever… This is getting to be a rather long parenthetical statement, isn’t it?)
Oddly enough, just seeing a card in shiny, brand new condition tempts me to use it. I think that means I’m an American. After all, we’re a Bible-believing nation, right? And like it says in Hezekiah 4:11-13 (WIV) —
“When thou hast a new credit card, thou shalt use it to purchase all that thy heart desires: oxen, sheep, and victuals for thy family and friends, and many feasts. Thou shalt upgrade the furnishings of thine dwellings and purchase many garments that otherwise thou can affordeth not.
“And when thy purchasing is finished — or, if never finishing, should the pace of thy purchasing diminisheth for a brief moment — thou shalt look upon thy new belongings and thy expanded domain and declare it good that thou doest not have to pay now. For indeed, the credit card allowest thee to pay tomorrow! And pay thou wilt, for ever and ever — even unto the second and third generation — as thou hast with thy whole heart mortgaged thine entire future for the sake of thine brief present.”
Come to think of it, some of you may not have that book in your Bibles, seeing how it’s a book unique to the disputed Apocrypha Americana. (Actually, my copy of the Woefully Inaccurate Version™ is the only translation that I’ve seen that carries it.) I can understand why it is not a part of the accepted canon, seeing how it seems to contradict the admonition of Proverbs 22:7…
[Personally, I think that after 9/11 one of the greatest mistakes made by our national leadership was to make the great rallying cry directed to the American people essentially the message “Go out and buy something!” But that is a blog entry for another time, and Pre-Teen Camp planning stuff beckons me to return… If I don’t talk to you tomorrow, have a great Sabbath! (And even if I do, have a good one anyway! 🙂 )]